Wednesday, January 15, 2020

Days 11-15

Just a quick entry to relate that the last few days have been great.  I've been having a minimum of cravings, feeling alert and confident, and even having moments of giddiness.  My sleep is good sometimes and getting better, but still not great most of the time.  But more of the time now, and definitely pretty much always better than it way.

My relationship with my kids, especially my son, feels richer and more nurturing, and I feel like a whole new world has opened up in so many other ways, just in having new interests, in thinking about new possibilities.    I mean to write a list too about all of the bad things related to my alcohol use, the regret and shame, the not so good feeling, the tiredness and preoccupation so I don't forget.  I definitely don't miss the hangovers and self-loathing and insecurity about my actions. There is so much more I could say about all of this.  That I want to say, but one thing being AF has not freed up as much as I had hoped is time.  At least not yet.  My 11.5 hour work day and caring for two kids does not leave me a lot of extra time to fill many days.  But I wanted to get something down today.  So I did.  I know there are challenges ahead but being alcohol free is great, and I feel really grateful.  The Alcohol Experiment private facebook group has really helped me too in sharing!  I highly recommend.

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